Everything gravitated to the center...

More ~ J. Englishman

Well she says life sucks it's the truth I mean
Didn't you think it'd be better than this
So where's that prize that I was promised?
Where's my great reward?
Where's my happiness?

Coz I want something more
I need something more

We're all style over substance and
We're pride reluctance to the bitter end
So give me passion over reason
Give me something to believe in
And I'll be content

Coz I want something more
I need something more

Give me passion give me feeling
Give me something to believe in
Give me passion over feeling
Give me reasons to keep breathing (x3)

Coz I want something more
I need something more
I need something
I want something
I need something
Give me something
Coz I want something more
I need something more

Give me passion give me feeling
Give me something to believe in
Give me passion over feeling
Give me reasons to keep breathing (x3)

Give me passion

Ok so this is most likely going to be my longest post ever...

In the past few days I've been the central focus point for the problems of a lot of people. I don't mind that so much, but I'm getting to that point where it's getting to be too much for me. I like helping people, I really do, but when someone is asking me to make decisions for them it gets to be too much.

I had another friend talk to me about dying that night that I heard about Sean. He's also still alive, but it turns out that he's been drinking since Sunday and he has heart problems. I hope he's going to start taking care of himself soon.

I had a lot of fun yesterday at karaoke. I didn't sing myself, but I sang with other people. When Geoff did Piano Man and we all sang with him was way too much fun. I always found that to be a really good song to bring people together. I don't know that we could have fit many more onto the chain we had going. I heart you Geoff!

After this past week I feel like I fit in a lot more then I did before. Seems that more and more people know who I am and talk to me when I'm just sitting around. Makes me feel good, even if all it is is people being nice.

I can't wait until Christmas break! My dad is plotting some sort of trip pr something and won't tell anyone in my family what it is. I'm terribly excited, and if I can afford it I may bring some things back for people. Depending on where we go. All I know is that it involves a plane and I've never been on a plane before. Hopefully there won't be any snakes.

Saw the James Bond movie twice. Sean Connery is still the best Bond... but Daniel Craig is still pretty hawt. Those blue eyes are just so sexy!

I think I need to go to another concert. I've never been to a full scale concert, but I kind of like the smaller venues. Much more personal. I think something like the Stabilo concert would be perfect for me right now. Calm but awesome. Those guys are super nice, by the way. And tall....

I've really gotten into different music this year. Hanging out with so many new people have given me new bands to listen to and so far I like them all. Rick, you are my hero for re-introducing me to Mindless Self-Indulgence, as well as hooking me on Blood Brothers. Geoff... I heart my music lessons with you. I shall be addicted to Indie in no time if this keeps up.

I'm really glad to be hanging out with Jordan again. You're way too much fun to not be around! Sorry your birthday present was so late.

Amber, I have a mark on my collar bone from you. I love it! You give the best bites and nibbles ever! I couldn't believe when my knees gave out on me. Hawt!

I re-discovered how comfy my bed is to sit on and just chill out. I may just watch a movie on my laptop so I don't have to move to the couch and use the TV.

Ok so I was feeling left out on the trend... go ahead, call me a poser if you want. I'm gonna do it anyways....

- I have to wear my glasses to do anything
- I love wearing my glasses
- I still have my N
- I have never owned my own car
- I never really though I was attractive at all, so I can't seem to understand why other people do
- I hardly ever watch TV anymore, aside from CSI
- I was a Brownie and a Girl Guide
- When I was 6 I had a cat named Zeke, I still miss him
- City of Angels always makes me cry
- I was (and I guess I still am) a Job's Daughter [for the love of God don't ask me about it, please]
- I met Narduar (if you don't know who that is, that shows how impressive the meeting must have been)
- Many people mistake my friendliness for flirting and visa versa
- My natural hair color is brown
- I have never been further than Edmonton
- When I get married I want it to be in the fall.
- Autumn is my favorite season. I find the colors beautiful and I think everything seems so serene and magical.
- No one used to believe me when I told them that Tanner was my cousin... my female friends seemed to love him
- I am an online RPer
- One day I'm going to get a tattoo of wings with the Kanji symbol Tsubasa in the middle
- I want my tongue pierced so badly
- My brother and I get along really well and always have. I miss him alot.
- I was mad when they turned the only dance club in Campbell River into a strip club for the majority of the day now, even though it was my last night in town
- I played clarinet in band class
- The only reason I stayed in band class as long as I did was so I could go to Edmonton and I could see my friend Amanda
- I think my eyes are my best feature
- I sometimes get unexplainable chest pains
- One thing I want to learn before I can't is how to swing dance well
- I still love the Fraggles
- Most of my musical interests come from my dad. When my brother and I were young, one thing that we did with my dad all the time was listen to music.
- Hence why I love jazz and blues and classic rock more then anything else
- The Blues Brothers always makes me think of my dad
- I learned to sew from my mom, but sadly forgot how to do most of it
- My brother also has a high influence on my music tastes. Thanks to him I discovered the Dropkick Murphys.
- I could never live without my music and my movies
- My nicknames consist of Steph, Stephie, Stephernini, Stephernefer, Stepherino, Pervy, Karen (when I've done something bad), as well as others
- Kaitlyn (Kitty, Donna, whatever) calls me the Pop Culture Queen for some reason..... ok I know why...
- I didn't lose my virginity until last year
- I had a mushroom cut when I was 5
- I wish I could pull off fire engine red hair
- I really miss Adam, Nick, Amanda, Aaron, and Liz. I haven't seen any of them for so long.
- My favorite color is Lime Green (booya Amber!)
- I took Japanese for three years in high school.. I think I forgot it all
- I love video games
- But I would rather watch people play a game then play it myself
- My favorite movies are Pulp Fiction and Interview with the Vampire
- My dream job right now would to be to work in a video rental place until I get my teaching degree
- I wish I could sing as well as I used to
- I love to read
- My favorite Looney Tunes character is Marvin the Martian
- I watched Beakman's World BEFORE Bill Nye because Beakman's World came FIRST!! My dad and I would never miss it when I was young
- I care about people alot
- I hate being angry
- When I'm going to sleep I'll sleep on my side with my body pillow so it feels like there's someone there with me.
- I don't sleep well when I'm alone
- Quite often I'm convinced I have depression, but other times I'm too happy to even think that
- Sometimes I get upset and I can't figure out why
- I love to draw with charcoal and chalk
- Black and white photos are so much nicer than color ones
- I am the only one that carries my belief system. No one else seems to understand it properly.
- Therefore, no one knows what I believe in because I don't tell people
- Hand massages make me melt
- I used to lie about being teased in elementary school. I told people that a guy in my school teased me more then he did.
- I have a fetish for vampires
- My first kiss was with a guy who turned out to be gay
- When it rains it reminds me of home.
- When it rained at home I used to go to the park near my house and go on the swings
- I have always had more guy friends than girl friends
- I worry about people I care about more then I should
- I've only ever really had two jobs: One was at a sign making shop and the other is at Superstore.
- I miss working at the sign shop
- I am an Aquarius
- I own two corsets. Only five people have seen me in either of them.
- My two guilty spending pleasures are coats and lingerie
- I miss the social aspect of high school. We had a great group of friends
- I'd much rather have an average sized guy then one with a lot of muscles
- Dark curly hair makes me smile. I think it looks gorgeous
- I am incredibly self-conscious, but I try very hard to hide it
- Monty Python and the Holy Grail is so awesome
- I love to walk in the rain
- I am a water person. I love being wet or swimming or even just being near water
- I've never left Canada that I can remember
- I was at Expo '86.
- I want to go skinny dipping.
- I was a pot smoker for a total of about 9 months and then stopped again
- I am a non-self-appointed guidance counsellor, in the most basic form. I like to help people with things that bother them. I even have a few regular "clients." Don't worry, I don't charge.
- If I could regain contact with any friend I don't have contact with now, it would be Rowen. He was a great friend and I hope he's doing well.
- My dream car is a 1969 Ford Mustang Mach One in either lime green or cobalt blue
- The friend I have stayed in contact with the longest is Cindy (over 15 years)
- I still have letters from when Sean lived in Sayward, notes from Kitty that we passed in class, and letters from my extended family in England
- I can't find any of Andy's letters he sent from Calgary and Fort Saint John
- I had a pen pal in Thailand named P.
- I used to have the nickname Shorty. Not because I was short (I wasn't), but from my favorite character on a video game for PS1
- I want to find Bust-A-Groove so I can play Shorty again
- I love learning about different countries
- My grade 4 teacher was my favorite teacher ever. I think he teaches in Indonesia now.
- Up until about grade 5 or 6, many people thought Cindy and I were sisters
- I don't like being alone
- I had a break up once where I thought the guy was going to hurt me, though he showed no signs of doing so, but I was paranoid for months. I still have a general paranoia that sprung from that time period
- I hated Andy when I first met him