Saturday, December 30, 2006

The afterburn never wears off...

What's this? A new post? Does that mean..? Yes it does!

I'm back from a joyful time down in the sunny land of California! Hooray!

Just pretty much wanted to let you all know that I am alive and my plane didn't crash or anything. I wasn't kidnapped by Americans. Mickey Mouse didn't murder me in my sleep.

I will be setting up a separate log for my adventure journal which I kept while I was there. Once its all set up and ready I will post the link here and on my links slot.

Hope everyone had a great holiday!

Friday, December 15, 2006

Your joy lights up the room...

Crazy ~ Gnarls Barkley

I remember when, I remember, I remember when I lost my mind
There was something so pleasant about that place.
Even your emotions had an echo
In so much space

And when you're out there
Without care,
Yeah, I was out of touch
But it wasn't because I didn't know enough
I just knew too much

Does that make me crazy?
Does that make me crazy?
Does that make me crazy?
Probably

And I hope that you are having the time of your life
But think twice, that's my only advice

Come on now, who do you, who do you, who do you, who do you think you are,
Ha ha ha bless your soul
You really think you're in control

Well, I think you're crazy
I think you're crazy
I think you're crazy
Just like me

My heroes had the heart to lose their lives out on a limb
And all I remember is thinking, I want to be like them
Ever since I was little, ever since I was little it looked like fun
And it's no coincidence I've come
And I can die when I'm done

Maybe I'm crazy
Maybe you're crazy
Maybe we're crazy
Probably

Uh, uh

Well my friends, this will probably be my last update until the new year. I can't believe that this time next week I will be in another country. Yes Ky, I know: Campbell River Baby. Still doesn't change the fact that I am excited.

I hope you all have a great Christmas holiday! Best wishes and merry times to all. If you end up having a party, have tons of fun!

To those of you in Christmas Carol, I hope you guys have the most awesome time ever. I will be there in spirit, watching and clapping loudly. Though you may not be able to hear it, it will be there.

To all the other performances going on (I don't know what they are or when they go), I wish the best of luck as well. You all are amazing, no matter what you do.

I can now say with certainty that I am excited. Andy will be in tonight, Amanda is coming in tomorrow. The three of us are going to the mall tomorrow. Tomorrow night we are hanging out with Kitty and Drea (yay!) and it will be like old times back in CR.

I want to thank all of you before I go. Thanks for helping me fit in around here. I'm not alone, thanks to all of you.

Merry Christmas everyone! I'll see you all in the New Year! Let me know if there's a New Year's thing going on!

Crazy ~ Gnarls Barkley
This video always makes me smile


Saturday, December 09, 2006

Crushed in the will to live..

Well I have totally enjoyed going out pretty much every night this week. Ever since I made my post about the dillemma with my roommate, I've been invited somewhere or something. It was really nice to get out of the house, even though she wasn't there most of the time. Amazingly.. she was at home alone last night.

Though the stress of being ready to murder my roommate has passed, the even more daunting stress of exams is kicking me in the face. When I wasn't with people, I was on my laptop reading my notes. Too much stress has been pushing down on my shoulders this month and I seriously need to be given a massage or something. On Wednesday, when Jordan saved me from missing my exam (I heart you forever for that by the way) I got sick before he got there. Then on my way up to the room I nearly fainted from not being able to breathe. I don't know why I get so worked up over little things like that, but I think there might have been other things on top of it. Why am I so stressed? I should be bouncing up and down thinking about how much fun I'm going to have in two weeks, but all I can focus on is how much I think I'm going to ruin my chances of moving on with what I'm doing.

I can't wait for my exams to be done so I can relax a little. I've been trying to distract myself for the moment by trying to figure out how Kitty did all that stuff to her blog... I want to change my colors and stuff! Though, I did find cool headers and stuff where I can write little quoty things...

So, I'm trying not to get my hopes up like I did last time, but it may work out that on the 15th Andy might be able to get up here for the weekend. It'll kinda suck because I'll have to work for a large part of it (one shift is at 9:30 am, blech) but I'm sure we can work everything out. Also, Amanda might come for a day or two. Very excited about that too. I miss you a lot, Manna! So hopefully everything works out, but don't let me get my hopes up or I may end up just super down again.

I think that's it for me today. I'm up for things to do if anyone wants to steal me away somewhere and do something fun. Just gimme a call, or email or whatever. When I'm not out somewhere I'm glued to my computer.


And now for your viewing pleasure, The Messenger by The Tea Party...

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Shadows pass by without a second glance..

New Girl ~ The Suicidal Machines

Well, I can't wait to tell you all about her.
All about my new girl.
(He can't wait to tell you 'bout his new girl.)
And I can't wait for you to hear me shout it.
All about my new girl.
(He can't wait to tell you 'bout his new girl.)

Ahhh

When we were together,
You tried to break my heart.
So, you always did your best
To keepin' us apart.
And now you're dead and gone.
I got a new thing going.
Can't wait to see your face
When you and your friends show up.

So, I got a (A NEW GIRL!) [4x]

Something makes you think that you're some kind of winner.
So, you wanna get married and cook somebody's dinner?
So, you're makin' fun of my 'cause I'm young and got no money.
You've got no time for school 'n books.
You've got no time to study.

Well, I can't wait to tell you all about her.
All about my new girl.
(He can't wait to tell you 'bout his new girl.)
I can't wait for you to hear me shout it.
All about my new girl.
(He can't wait to tell you 'bout his new girl.)

THE NEW GIRL!

So, I got a (A NEW GIRL!) [x4]

Hey! [x16]
Ahhhhhhhhh

You're the type of girl that any guy would die for.
That's the way it looks
And I'm really glad to think so.
Sunk into my friends and your popularity.
But you never ever took the time to see the real me.

Well, I can't wait to tell you all about her.
All about my new girl.
(He can't wait to tell you 'bout his new girl.)
I can't wait for you to hear me shout it.
All about my new girl.
(He can't wait to tell you 'bout his new girl.)

THE NEW GIRL!

So, I got a (A NEW GIRL!) [x4]

He can't wait to tell you all about.. (THE NEW GIRL!) [x4]
THIS ONE!
NEW GIRL!

Hey guys. I know this song is kind of out of placce in light of today's entry, but it's just too much fun to listen to. I recommend it to everyone who can handle 90's punk music.

Happy Ninja Day everyone! Apparently December 5th is Ninja Day, where all people have the chance to be a ninja! I, of course, couldn't pass up the chance to be a ninja so I found myself a scarf and my friend's oversized black coat and made myself a shotty ninja costume.

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

What do you mean "Ninjas don't wear green plaid scarves"?

On another note, Andy can't come up for at least a week now. Bobby and Mike back out on getting him up here like they said they would, and Tanya says I can't have him around until after her big important exams. Apparently these two will determine on whether she can get into the program or not. I wonder if I'll even see her this weekend...

So, sadly, this will be another week that I go by with a bunch of let downs, possibly next week as well. Things just don't want to work for me eh?

On that note... ya I have no other notes this time...
Anyone wanna do something with me?

Sunday, December 03, 2006

A letter...

Israel's Son ~ silverchair

Hate is what I feel for you,
And I want you to know that I want you dead.
You're late for the execution...
If you're not here soon, I'll kill your friend instead.

All the pain I feel
Couldn't start to heal
Although I would like it to

I hate you and your apathy.
You can leave, you can leave, I don't want you here.
I'm playing this pantomime,
But I don't see you showing any signs of fear.

All the pain I feel
Couldn't start to heal
Although I would like it to

This time I'm for real
My pain can not heal
You will be dead when I'm through

Pain and execution
Put your hands in the air
Put your hands in the air
The air... yeah

I am, I am Israel's son
Israel's son I am
Put your hands in the air
Put your hands in the air

Why the fuck do I have to have a fucking time restraint on how long I can see my fucking boyfriend!? Fuck! You get to see yours every fucking day! Do you have any idea on how much that really brought me down? Fuck you! You sit there and talk to me like you fucking understand how I feel and now I know you’re fucking lying! Fuck your rules! I fucking live here too! Next time you want to do something maybe I’ll pull a fucking rule on you! Fuck! You have no fucking idea...

Finally I get to see him and out of the kindness of someone else’s fucking generosity AND MY OWN... and you bring it down with a time limit! Why don’t you try being away from yours for five minutes? Try being away for a day. Try a week. Try a FUCKING MONTH! Then you tell me if you can handle having ME tell YOU that YOU ONLY GET TWO NIGHTS TOGETHER and then be apart for another MONTH!

Try not having a cell phone. Try not having internet. Try having to pay extra for every time you use the phone. Try living away from pretty much everyone you ever knew. Try living without him for even just a week. Try not having a car. Try relying on other people to get him messages. Try going through everything we had to go through to be together! Try six years of friendship! Try nearly seven months worth of an earned relationship! Try cherishing every second you hear his voice on the phone because you don’t know when you might hear it again! TRY FUCKING ENJOYING EVERY INSTANCE YOU GET TO SEE HIM BECAUSE IT WILL BE A LONG TIME BEFORE YOU GET TO AGAIN!

Try spending everything you have just to get those two nights....


Then try doing it all again. Time after time after time.



How many days have you spent with yours? 8 and still counting.


Sorry about that guys. I had to get that out of my system. I was talking to my roommate over MSN today (she's at her boyfriend's for the night), and she told me that Andy can stay here for a maximum of two nights. I realize that he may have to go back around then anyways, but it just makes me mad that she would do that to me.

Saturday, December 02, 2006

Entertainment and truth can go hand in hand...

Spokesman ~ Goldfinger

What happened to dignity
Did it go away again?
Just like some worn out trend?
Will I still defend emotions?
What happened to honesty?
I don't see it on the Top Ten
I only see it in what has been
Cuz I still defend devotion

Am I alone?

Don't wanna rest
I don't wanna breathe
When I wanna hear about life
Don't wanna hear a spokesman
I don't wanna test
I want to believe
The god damn singer wrote the song
Don't wanna hear a spokesman

What happened to integrity
I don't see it on MTV
All I see is choreography
And I'll never be a dancer
What happened to puberty?
Bad skin and insecurity?
And who the fuck is Felicity?
Cuz I got problems of my own

Am I alone?

Don't wanna rest
I don't wanna breathe
When I wanna hear about life
Don't wanna hear a spokesman
I don't wanna test
I want to believe
The god damn singer wrote the song
Don't wanna hear a spokesman

Don't wanna rest
I don't wanna breathe
When I wanna hear about life
Don't wanna hear a spokesman
I don't wanna test
I want to believe
The god damn singer wrote the song
Don't wanna hear a spokesman

Don't wanna rest
And don't wanna breathe
When I wanna hear about life
Don't wanna hear a spokesman
I don't wanna test
I want to believe
The god damn singer wrote the song
Don't wanna hear a spokesman

I don't wanna rest
And don't wanna breathe
When I wanna hear about life
Don't wanna hear a spokesman

That's a really fun song to listen to. If any of you want to hear it, I can send it to you, or I guess you could look it up.

So I called Bobby's today to talk to Andy, and Mitch (Bobby's 2 year old son) answered the phone. He can't talk and doesn't quite understand "Go get mom", but it was so cute to hear him babble into the phone. Finally, Bobby made it to the phone and answered. At first she thought I was someone else, and then when she figured out it was me, after I asked for Andy and assured her I was in Nanaimo, she told me something exciting. Apparently, since Andy's been down lately, Bobby and Mike were thinking about sending him down here for a few days. Sean has offered to take over looking after Mitch, and Mike might drive him down on Tuesday. I might even get him out to karaoke, hahaha. Last week, Davies asked me when I was going to get Andy down here. Turns out it may be sooner then I thought.

I'm thankful that classes are over this week. It'll be nice to get some time to just hang out before I leave. Still really excited about this!

Also, I decided to jump on the "I like" bandwagon....

I like mystery novels. I like crime novels. I like action movies. I like vampires. I like to people watch. I like finding constellations. I like lying in the grass in the summer. I like walking in the rain until I’m soaked. I like to doodle. I like to see people smile. I like music. I like learning Indie music from Geoff. I like to write. I like the color green in all shades. I like photography. I like tiger lilies. I like well done bondage photos. I like to daydream. I like the idea of spirits, and I do believe in them. I like the idea of love at first sight. I like dark artwork. I like to do dark artwork. I like the taste of mint and chocolate. I like pasta. I like to cook. I like to make things. I like giving things to people. I like spending time alone. I like being around people more. I like my friends. I like boys. I like girls too. I like making people smile. I like roleplaying online. I like piercings. I like tattoos. I like leather boots. I like long coats. I like scarves. I like gloves. I like my glasses. I like the emo clothing style, not the attitude. I like guys in dress clothes. I like handcuffs. I like it when people play with my hair. I like giving massages. I like kids. I like the way blood looks. I like being happy. I like cartoons. I like to watch improv. I like making music videos. I like seeing Kaitlyn acting. I like watching Andy draw. I like watching Jordan.. be... Jordan.... (there’s no other word for you, hun ^___^) I like going to the movie theater. I like cute lingerie. I like living away from home for the first time. I like visiting Campbell River. I like knowing that there is a person just like me out there. I like reading graphic novels. I like having red hair. I like being in water. I like the sound of slow acoustic guitars. I like seeing concerts in small venues.